Making the Right Decisions

I'm starting to make the right decisions again. Yay! Yesterday when I got home I took Parker down to the park and did my workout. It was pretty good actually. Forgot to wear my heart rate monitor (after all that about using all my gadgets yesterday), but worked pretty hard and it felt great! I had one very happy but tired puppy after as he pretty much chased the ball the entire time.

We made yummy salmon and avocado for dinner. Such a healthy dinner, and so super easy. I was supposed to play basketball last night too, but the other team defaulted. Was really disappointed at first as I was looking forward to playing, but was pretty happy when I had time to spend in a bubble bath, complete with candles. So nice!

Was hard to get up this morning but I did it! Did gazillions of hill sprints. Or at least 16 of them. 6 at 60s and 10 at 30s. Felt pretty good again. And have made good eating decisions so far today too. Porridge with kiwifruit for breakfast (yum!) and a Big Ass Salad (BAS) for lunch. So tasty! I had a fleeting thought about buying crap when I was out for lunch, but I didn't and am happy with myself for that.

I have had a bit of a headache on and off today and yesterday afternoon and evening. I think maybe from not getting my afternoon sugar hit. It's not pleasant, but I'm going to fill up my water bottle, make a cup of peppermint tea and take some nurofen then get back to work!

Here's to making the right decisions!!

Disappointed in Myself

When I take a step back and think about it I am so disappointed in myself. We booked our holiday months ago and I've had plans to lose weight since then. However, I've been a complete failure. I've lost and then gained those same few kgs over and over again, but have made no real progress. Our holiday is now 2 weeks away, and until 10 mins ago I had no motivation to do anything about it. In fact, I was thinking about how I can get away from my desk to go buy food. Luckily before I did that I decided to take a look and see if there was anything new on the blogs I read, and I found something that's made me give myself a little kick in the backside, and think although I've wasted most of these past few months, I can still get back on track and make a (much smaller) difference in the 2 weeks I have left. Even if I'm not in the shape I wanted to be, I will be feeling so much better after 2 weeks of clean eating than if I just continue the way I am.

The post I found was one by Coco Butter (http://cocogirlbutter.blogspot.com.au/). She's one impressive gal. She wrote how she's had a crap few weeks, but is pulling out all the stops and getting back into it. It's given me motivation to attempt to do the same myself. She wrote how she made a list of everything that has helped her in the past. On that list is using all her gadgets - I have loads of gadgets and love them! And she's signed up for 12WBT again and is doing all the pre-season tasks - I'm not signing up again as I feel like I have got what I can out of it for now, and I'm going to be away for so long. But I can still do those tasks.

Anyway, here's my brainstorming list of what has helped me in the past, and what I can do to get back on track and stay there for the next two weeks until we leave. In no particular order:

• Use my gadgets - wear my heart rate monitor and sync it with the website and view my results
• Make a plan for the next two weeks - and stick to it! Plan every meal and exercise session
• Be aware - consciously think about the decisions I make, and ensure I make the right decision every time
• Don't let one wrong decision break me - so often when I make one (or more) wrong decisions I give up and it turns into an all out failure - don't let this happen - get straight back into it immediately
• Go to the supermarket - when we have no food we make bad choices
• Put yummy food on the plan - its no good making a plan full of food we don't want to make or eat as we won't stick to it
• Just get out of bed! Put the alarm clock across the room and no snoozing! Who cares if it's cold - I won't be cold for long!
• Make an inspiration chart - the first few times these helped me immensely - I don't even look at the one on the fridge any more. It needs updating.
• Look how far I have come - pull out my before and afters and take a look
• Try on my small clothes and see what I can fit
• Read the 12WBT forums - not an option right now as I'm not signed up, but surely I can find some other inspiring reads (like Coco Butter) that will provide the same motivation
• Check in with myself each night - spend 5 mins every night before I go to bed thinking about this stuff and focusing on myself and how tomorrow is going to play out
• Stop reading my Kindle on the way to and from work - save it for before bed only - reading is one of my triggers - all I want to do is eat - instead just walk and think about things, or read something inspiring
• Eat breakfast before I go to work

I'm actually looking forward to going home now, heading to the park and doing my exercise with Parker. I do have basketball at 9, but I was supposed to do a session this morning - there is no reason why I can't do both!

More ups and downs

Feels like it should be Friday already and it's only Wednesday! Been a massive week at work. It's all going well and I'm loving it but it's pretty full on. Got 2 new massive projects starting up which I am looking forward to... I think! 

Been a crap week so far eating wise though. Way to much for dinner last night and I had a binge today. Been feeling a bit sick too. Just a head cold but makes me feel lousy and haven't done all my exercise. Did manage to get up and do an easy workout this morning though and played super hard at basketball which is good. Actually looking forward to running in the morning! Hope I feel up to it! 

Jillfit today is still about insecurity. I have to name 3 situations where I felt insecure, threatened, upset or disappointed. Hmmm...

1. Where I feel like someone at work is getting what I think I deserve or getting put ahead of me or just plain doing really well or better than me

2. When I feel like Greg doesn't care about keeping our house nice and I feel like I need to badger him to help out our clean up his stuff

3. When I'm out and other people who are much smaller than me are discussing how fat they are or how much weight they have put on our just even how heavy they are and without fail I am heavier than then and likely will always be as I am so much taller

4. When others are complaining about something outside our control like how bad the reffing is at basketball or some moron politician 

5. When people are taking about politics or musicians or actors I know nothing about

Ok so that is more than 3. Oh well. Now I guess I am supposed to start being aware of the situations. Next step is to work out why i feel like that apparently. 

The view from my workout this morning:

Up, down and now back up again!

Was a little bit rubbish today and yesterday. Woke up after the party a bit hung over, also with a cold and just feeling lousy. Needless to say I didn't do my exercise. I didn't eat too badly. But wasn't great either. Also didn't manage to get up this morning. Still feeling pretty sniffly and rubbish.

Feeling like I did better than normal though... I didn't binge at lunch, just had sushi. And just did a workout. Going to have to shuffle my days around this week as I didn't do Tuesdays one but at least I did something. Looking forward to getting up tomorrow and getting back into it properly.

I forgot to write about Sunday. Greg and I took parker for a massive walk and stopped for a picnic. It was lovely! My legs felt great after my big run, but they were pretty tired and sore on Monday.

Today's Jillfit is about insecurity. I have 3 questions to answer:

1. What's the most important thing I want to achieve out of my weight loss journey?
To lose enough weight that I don't feel and look fat any more - let's go with 10kgs.

2. Why is that important? What will it mean when I achieve it?
So I can feel good about myself. So I am healthy. So I'm not the fat one in the group (I'm already the tall one, don't need to be the fat one too). So I can wear whatever I want. So people will look at me and see a tall pretty woman, but a fatty. So I can look good on the beach. So I can look like the wife I want to be for Greg. So I can look good in my holiday photos

3. Is there a scenario where I may not achieve this but I will be ok?
Yeah. I won't be happy about it. But I will be OK. I will just still be fat and I will feel gross and disappointed in myself but I will be OK.

Phew. That was quite hard. Especially number one.

I can walk

Actually pulled up really well after my 12 km run last night. Woke up feeling pretty good. Did some work then Greg and I took parker for a really long walk and he even went for a swim. I think he loved it. And I did too. We walked for about 2 hours.

Went to a friend's party tonight and I did well. Took it easy on drinks and nibbles. And then was good when we continued on for pizza for dinner too. Pretty happy with myself. Prob drank s little too much but much less than normal.

Jillfit today is about brutal honesty. Here we go...

If left to my own devices, I would spend all day doing this: reading my book and pottering around the house and maybe crap movies

The 3 adjectives I hope to portray in the world & to others are: happy, relaxed, friendly

An example(s) of when I was each of those 3 things is: ???

I feel the most fulfilled and excited about life when I am doing this: following through on my plans

Besides fiction, the genre of book I am most interested is: fantasy

In times when I am obsessed with food or binge, the #1 reason I do this is: because I can

When I feel uncomfortable in my skin, in that moment, I feel: awful, shy, introverted, want to hide

I feel most beautiful when I am doing this: eating well and exercising and not being a lazy slob

I know this positive quality about myself (I don't need anyone to affirm it): I have long legs and am normally positive about situations

Hmmm... Will read through that again tomorrow when not so tired and not a bit tiddly :)

Wonder if I will be able to walk tomorrow?

Knackered! Had a pretty Damn good week. Work is ruling. I exercised plenty, including 2 evening ones when I didn't get up in the morning. I even ate well. And it wasn't even all that hard! Feeling a little tired and cranky. But that's too be expected. Quite pleased with myself!

Got up and did some work this morning which had been hanging around for ages. Didn't do enough but made a stay at least. Was planning to go for a 12km run but it was pouring down. So i put it off. Then we were out and about doing errands and finally got home around 5. Was feeling so tired after putting the groceries away and just wanted to collapse with wine and cheese. Instead I went for a run. I started out thinking I will just go for a little one. Then I was aiming for 5km. Then 8km. Then 10. Once I hit 9 I though 3 isn't much more so I pushed through to 12km. And it felt good! There were times I struggled (the first few kms were so slow) but mainly I powered through it. So glad I went even though I am exhausted now and my glutes are so sore I'm not sure I will be walking tomorrow!

My mindness exercise for yesterday was to be aware of my feelings and try determine what caused me to feel like that. Thinking about today I got quite upset and angry at Greg a couple times. Looking back I think it was due to me thinking of all the things I need to do and not having time. And also being annoyed at myself for not keeping on top of my work like I should. And the messy house. The may house Greg can contribute to resolving but the others are up to me to either do myself or all for help.

Oh and also I'm just really tired and low energy from the change up to doing more exercise and eating less. That will get better though. It always does.

Mojo is Back!

Had a much better last few days. I think the main instigators were being organised, and drinking my water. When I look back at my "fails" after a big success, for pretty much every one, I've been disorganised and have stopped drinking water. Add this to being tired or hungover, and it's pretty easy to see why things have fallen by the wayside. It's so much easier when you are in that state to eat comfort food, and order if you have nothing in the house. Going to the supermarket it way too hard!

Anyway, this week have been exercising and eating much better, and I'm feeling good! I've also stumbled across Jill Fit (http://jillfit.com/) and signed up to her 10 week mindset course. It's probably just another "get rich (or thin) quick" scheme, but I like some of the stuff she is saying. I know how to exercise, and know what to eat. What I can't seem to get consistently correct is my mind. Apparently for this I get an email a day, and some exercises to do.

The first email was about Trust. Basically trusting the process more, and giving up some control. This is something I struggle a bit with. I feel like if I give up control, I will go out of control and eat everything (which is essentially what happens when I get unorganised). She says if I give up control, then I also give up the food controlling me. Hmmm... Anyway, the exercise is to write down the 3 most terrifying outcomes that might come to pass if I give up my control over food, then think about them and determine if I can deal with the outcome. Here we go:

if I give up my control over food...

1. I won't think about what I eat and will eat way too much meaning that I will get even fatter - I can deal with this outcome - I already have! It's not good, and I don't want it but I can deal with it.
2. People will see how much I eat and think I'm a gross fat pig - this is harder. I often hide what I eat from others. If I give up control, then does that come out? Not sure I am ready to deal with it.
3. Can't think of #3

I kind of get it. Giving up my control is not a free ticket to easy anything, and even if it was and I did nothing really really bad will happen. And maybe if I give up control then I will stop obsessing and thinking about food so much and it will lose its control over me. Let's hope so! 

Lost my Mojo :(

Well, I had one awesome week. I did so well, dropped some kgs and felt amazing! Then we had our Christmas in July party. I even did super well at the party - didn't eat much fondue and had a sensible sized meal. I did drink a lot though. Anyway, woke up the next morning feeling proud of myself, then proceeded to completely self-sabotage. So dumb! For the next week I proceeded to eat anything and everything I could put my hands on. I'm now right back where I was 2 weeks ago. I'm two weeks closer to Europe, but have made zero progress. Why do I keep doing this???

I'm getting back on track though. I think once again, one of the main causes was not being prepared food wise. We ate rubbish that whole week cos we couldn't be bothered going to the supermarket. We had no meal plan, and nothing to make yummy healthy food. Meant lots of takeaways, buying lunches, and eating crap. So disappointing!

This week however, I'm starting to feel back on track. Still didn't manage to get up on Monday, but at least I got up and did something this morning, and we've had two good dinners in a row. Good healthy and good yummy. The fridge is full with yummy healthy food, which I am actually looking forward to eating. Now just have to stick to it. We've missed most of our opportunity to get in shape for Europe, and the timeframe for Operation Europe is definitely shrinking without progress being made, but we still have 4 and a bit weeks to go. That's long enough to make a difference, and that difference in how we look and feel will make a big difference to our holiday. It's worth 4 weeks of sacrifice. I can do this. Not only I can. I will. I've started already, and continuing now. Going to do the dishes then a quick ab workout which I didn't do this morning. Then bed and lights out before 10:30 so I can get up to exercise in the morning. I loved my run this morning. I really enjoy it. So dumb that I stop doing it...

Go Me!

Feeling much more motivated and back into this the past few days. I've been eating better (not amazing but better!), and have done 4 exercise sessions. Made some stupid excuses and didn't get out of bed to do this morning's one though - was feeling so exhausted after last night's basketball, and bed was so snuggly. I did really enjoy the extra hours sleep! Debating now whether to it after work. I would like to, but there's a lot we need to get done for Christmas in July on Saturday. I just need to make a commitment to it I guess...

Pretty happy with myself at lunch - had loads of opportunity to overeat, but just went home and had my leftovers which were tasty as. Wasn't great at breakfast - had myself a scrambled egg and haloumi wrap. Didn't get up early enough for breakfast. No coffee this morning though.

An update on Operation Europe: first weekly weigh in today. It hasn't even been a week and I'm down 3.1kgs! Yes I know, those first few come off really easily, but still! Feeling loads better. And I have another win - lately I've been wearing my jeans with the button undone, and just the belt done up (shhh... don't tell anyone). Today I have had the button done up all day and it hasn't even been uncomfortable. Amazing what a difference just a few days makes. Need to keep at it - imagine the difference a few more weeks will make! 6 weeks to go today. Can't wait!

Picking up the ball yet again...

I've totally dropped the ball... been lazy, eating too much and just pretty damn useless! Time to get my A into G and get back into it. I feel so good when I am doing well. Today and yesterday haven't been too bad. Exercised both mornings, and ate pretty well - not perfect, but so much better than the past few weeks have been! I'm tired, but I'm feeling a bit better. Looking forward to the well-oiled machine feeling when it's easy to get out of bed and things don't seem such a mission.

I've spent some time tonight re-looking at my goals and making myself yet another geek sheet to try keep focused. We have just over 6 weeks until Europe. I'm going to kick ass and be feeling so good about myself getting on that plane!

My Operation Europe Geek Sheet - can't wait to start filling it in. What a geek!! :)

Some simple things I've realised that I need to remember:

• Parker doesn't have to come with me every morning - it's ok to go for a run without him, and taking him for a walk is NOT an excuse to skip my workout. This morning we went down to the park with my yoga mat and I threw the ball between my sets (or at the top of every other pushup) and we both had a fab time. Yesterday morning I left him at home and he was just fine!
• Drinking water is massive for me - I find when I'm drinking lots of water I am far less likely to overeat later in the day. Seems simple, but often I realise it's water I'm craving far too late. Need to reach for the water bottle first, and if it's empty go fill it up!
• It DOES matter if I overeat - when I take the time to plan and prep and I will do SO much better, and when I eat things which aren't in my plan I undo so much of the hard work I've done, and I feel horrible and like I've let myself down. I tell myself it doesn't matter and I can do better tomorrow. This isn't right - I need to do better RIGHT NOW!

I also need to keep remembering why I am doing this and that there is no more "I'll do it later". I need to do this now, for Europe, and also for the rest of my life. I loved how I was feeling last year when I was focused. Need to get there again - one step at a time - every day be better than yesterday.

I'm looking forward to getting my mind and body back into the right shape. Go me!!

So tired...

Am absolutely exhausted tonight. Did am awesome workout this morning and then played bball tonight and am feeling it. My body is pretty sore. Feels good though! Played hard at bball but didn't do that well. We got smashed.

Eating wise today started well with porridge this morning and then leftovers for lunch. But then I caved and had a stupid binge. Stupid mind telling me it's OK cos it's totally not. Least I didn't have dinner after basketball. I'm hungry now but feel more like sleeping. Don't think I will get more than a couple pages read before I pass out tonight!

Tomorrow will be a challenge as I'm going to chatswood on the train. It's one of my triggers.  I buy food then scoff it on the train. Not tomorrow. Tomorrow I am going to be awesome!

Ready steady go. No more failures!

Had an average day today. Work was great. I'm loving my job right now which is awesome. Had a good morning. Got up and did my workout outside in the back yard. It was a little cold but not to bad. I did most of it, but didn't do the abs. Just got a little bored. Will do the abs soon I think. Once dinner settles.

Eating was pretty bad. Breakfast good - yummy porridge and kiwifruit. Lunch initially good with a tuna egg sammich. Then it went downhill. Today with butter and cheese. Then had to go to chatswood for work and proceeded to buy not one, but four sweet slices, and ate most on the train. So gross. Most weren't even nice and just made me feel sick. I did throw most of the last away. Why do I do this to myself? I know it's putting me back but I can't stop. At least we made dinner. Thought I did help myself to some cheese while it was cooking.

Tomorrow is another day. Need to eat well if I am going to succeed. No more failures. I am going to chatswood again tomorrow or Thursday so will prove to myself that I can go out and about without inhaling food. I can do it! Now to do my abs before game of thrones. Ready steady go!

Back up again today

Morning run selfie. Think I need to practise the selfie pose...

Man, I'm totally up and down like a yo-yo. Was feeling so terrible about everything yesterday afternoon. After I wrote the last post Greg and I took Parker for a walk and I relaxed and things started looking up. We had a nice dinner, even though it was not what we planned cos neither of us could be bothered going to the supermarket. still it was fairly healthy, and we didn't order!

When my alarm went off this morning I was so tempted to go back to sleep. Getting out of bed was so incredibly hard! I made myself do it though, and am super glad I did. My run was good but hard. 10mins easy, running drills, then 8x 3min at 80%. I was stuffed by the last! Then I jogged home again, which was longer than the planned 5mins. I was pretty slow, but I got out of bed and did it. It was such a lovely morning too. Cold, but clear, and the sun came out.

I've done well so far with my eating today too. Forgot breakfast until later than I should have, but I did have it - yummy porridge which I made at work. Made for a very happy warm full belly! Then a pizza / pita / wrap thingy which I had half of at two different times.

Friends are coming over to watch the basketball this evening. We've got a lot to do - need to take Parker for a walk, clean up, go to the supermarket and do a little work all before they arrive around 7:30. Going to make sure I am good with my eating tonight. Luckily these friends don't drink, so there will be no temptation there!

Update before bed:
We did good! Luckily I got home from work early in time to take Parker for a walk. We so nearly caved and didn't go to the supermarket, but we made it, and had dinner on by the time friends arrived. I didn't overeat, and didn't drink. Go Me! And the right team won the NBA! Go Spurs!!

Today was a good day :)

The view on my run this morning. Pretty cool to have this just down the road from my house. Such a nice way to start the day!

Down

Feeling really down and crap tonight. Just full on sad for some reason. No one thing in particular, just lots of little things adding up I guess. It's been a great week at work, but my eating has been horrendous, and exercise pretty much non-existent. Feeling fat and gross and pathetic. It's not helping that the house is a mess and we haven't been to the supermarket. Also just worked out that the glass that the boys smashed when they were drunk the other weekend was one of the precious glasses my sister gave me for my 21st. Those glasses traveled all the way around Canada with me, back to NZ, then over here to Aussie. They have been n our shelves for less than 2 weeks after being in storage for years, and already one broken. It sucks!

Also doesn't help that Parker is being a right pain cos he's bred, and he's terrorising the cat. Poor cat!

I need to get myself into gear. There is not long at all now until Europe, and I've worse off than when I started Operation Europe. Feeling so down on myself. Need to get my act together and get sorted. Maybe I should just go for a run now. Get it out of my system. Will probably feel so much better. But it's dark, and it's cold. And today is supposedly my rest day. If I run today will I be too tired for the workouts this week? Mind you, I need to walk Parker in the morning as we won't have time tomorrow after work, so won't be doing a proper workout then. Unless I can get Greg out of bed to walk him. Don't really see that happening though.

Thinking I just needed a rant. Parker is going crazy. Think I will take him for a walk and get some time out for both of us.

Trail run done!

Yay. I did it. Got out of bed in the freezing cold and ran. Go me! I did pretty well I think. 7km through loads of hills and tricky terrain in 53 mins. Quite happy with how I went and already looking forward to beating my time next time!

I ran almost the whole way. Only stopped when I caught up to a whole load of people walking up stairs. Now sitting in the sun waiting for prize giving. Should probably just go home. But the sun is really nice!

Wondering whether to have bacon and eggs and coffee or to wait till I get home...

I am a moron

Reasons why I am a moron:

1. This week I have eaten anything and everything I could get my hands on. Sweets. Savory. Sugary drinks I don't normally touch. Butter. Lots of butter. And cheese. We've had take out 3 times. Some days I have eaten enough for a whole family. Why do I do this?

2. I have hardly exercised this week. A couple of pathetic sessions is all I have done.

3. It's late and I have to be up early for my run tomorrow but yet I am writing this. Maybe an excuse for not going as I will be too tired.

4. I haven't done hardly any ski Club work in days. Barely enough to just keep afloat. And I have loads to do. It's a long weekend and I'm going to have to now work a lot of it.

So so stupid. I've fucked up again. I had such a good week last week but this one h had been atrocious. I'm back to worse than I was 2 weeks ago. I do so well but then I sabotage it. Was feeling so good and my skin was looking better and clothes starting to fit better. And now I just feel terrible. Fat and bloated and head aches and just all round gross and disgusted with myself.

Last week I started operation Europe. We only have about 2.5 months until we go. Not long. One of my goals is to run these races. The first is tomorrow. I've been looking for reasons to not do it. But they are all just dumb excuses. My bag is packed and clothes laid out and alarm set. I'm going to get up and do it. No excuses! Let it be my first step to getting started again. I can and will do this. Time to get some sleep. My alarm will be going of way too soon.

Woot! Proud of Myself Today!

So this morning, my alarm went off at 8am, and I could hear the rain on the roof. I was supposed to be getting up and going for my run, but was quite thankful for the rain and my bed was so comfy and that seemed like a perfectly good excuse to stay in bed. I drowsed then read my book, and the rain stopped. I got up and put on my running clothes, but then pottered around, in the back of my mind knowing that if I procrastinated long enough there wouldn't be enough time and I'd be of the hook. Then, not sure why - maybe thinking about how well I've done so far this week, and also thinking about Operation Europe I decided to just freaking do it. So the shoes went on, and out the door I went. And it was great! I ran for 9kms, and felt like I could go further. Then when I got home I did the rest of the SSS workout too. Felt exhausted after, but also really good, and so proud of myself for just going and getting it done!

All up, it's been a pretty darn good week. A few slip ups (out for lunch, takeaways last night, more wine than planned), but nothing major, and am back into my exercise and loving it! The scales are already showing a smaller number, and I'm already fitting into clothes better. I'm wearing a dress I haven't put on in ages tonight, and although I've been slimmer, I feel good. Just need to keep this up and I'll manage Operation Europe no problem!

We're off to R & J's house soon for a 1st birthday party. They decided to have a party for us adults, so I'm sure there will be loads of wine consumed. I'm not feeling too bad about it though because of my run, and also think that will help me be sensible tonight, as I won't be thinking ah well, start again tomorrow. Instead I will be thinking about my run and the effort it was, and not wanting to put myself backwards.

I'm looking forward to continuing with this now. Today it's not too hard! :)

Operation Europe is Underway!

I've been reading a blog called Coco Butter by a girl who is also doing 12WBT. She does "operations" as her targets, which are sort of count downs to a certain timeframe or event. I like the idea, so have adopted it, and am starting Operation Europe! Her's are usually about fitting into a specific item of clothing. I haven't yet decided whether I will do that, or just work towards feeling awesome being in Europe, although maybe that's not specific enough!

Anyway, so far I have some weight goals, and also a list of running events  I want to do between now and then. Unfortunately as I didn't get my act together I missed the first one :(. No more excuses from here on though!

Weight Goals:

DATE	WEIGHT	REWARD
21 May 2014	85
20 Jun 2014	80	massage
18 Jul 2014	76	night / weekend away
15 Aug 2014	73	new clothes for Europe
20 August 2014	72	Europe!

Running Events:

• 10 May - Botany Bay Trail Run
• 8 Jun - St Ives Trail Run
• 13 Jul - Sydney Harbour 10km
• 20 Jul - Garigal Trail Run
• 3 Aug - St Ives Trail Run
• 10 Aug: City 2 Surf

Bring on Operation Europe!!

I'm excited about this! Been a good week so far - need to continue this through the weekend.

Ok decisions today

Had a pretty good day all things considered. Got up and did my workout which I actually enjoyed. Had a busy day at work. Ate well breakfast and lunch.

We went for a walk with parker after work supposedly to get something to make for dinner, but ended up at the Indian place down the road. It was actually quite good and I am proud of myself for how much I ate. I did well. Had a bit of wine though. Was lovely to sit and chat to Greg about our Europe holiday and have parker there with us too. Everyone loves him!

Bit later to bed than I wanted to be, but I fetal a pretty good day.

Go me!

Making the right decisions

Today has been a good day. So nearly didn't get up and do my exercise. So glad I did. And it's made such a difference to my mood today. I'm pretty tired but in a much better head space.

Came home at lunch and ate leftovers and then we just made eggs for dinner. Some of the guys from work went out for drinks and wanted me to join but I decided not to. So many good choices! Yay me!

Did my 12 min run this morning. I worked really hard but didn't beat my distance from last week. Just a bit sluggish. Looking forward to arms workout tomorrow to give me legs a rest!

Doing even a little is better than doing nothing!

No time for exercise this morning as was up early to make bacon and egg pie for a friend who has just had a gorgeous baby girl. Was stoked with how it came out. Looked perfect. I left it on the bench to cool and meant to come home at lunch to exercise and put it in the fridge. Instead I went to the pub worth work and completely forgot about the pie. It got left on the bench all day. Had to go get chicken and salad for my friend instead of pie as didn't want to risk it for them. I guess good news is that we got pie for dinner and don't have to cook tonight! Also got to see her baby when we dropped off their dinner. What a cutie!

Took parker for a walk after work. He was having such a good time running around and chasing his ball after being home alone all day. Then suddenly her just started limping. He doesn't seem to be sore, just stiff back legs. Hope it's nothing serious!

So what with parker, the pie disaster, not doing my exercise, going to the pub for lunch, a glad of stone at lunch then more at dinner I was feeling crap this evening. Just down about everything without really knowing why. Was about to go to bed and decided to do at least some exercise. So I got into it and did about half of today's workout. Not perfect, but a little is better than nothing right? Glad I did as feeling a little better. Now just need to turn out the light and get some sleep so I can get up and exercise tomorrow! Goodnight!

Slow start, but I'm getting there...

Well, we are at week 4 already, and I must say I haven't accomplished much yet! Been a very rocky start! I'm getting my act together now though, and have had a pretty good weekend and end to last week. Well, good only compared to the past few months. Still hasn't been great. But at least it has been better!

On Saturday I made myself get out of bed and went for an 8km run. And it felt great! Started out pretty slow, but got right into it and was so proud of myself for going, and also pretty happy at how I did considering I haven't run in ages! Pretty poor form considering I am supposed to be doing the 10km advanced 12WBT program! I have a trail run on Saturday which I really want to do. Was a bit worried I wasn't going to be able, but feeling ok about it after this run.

When I got back from my run I spent some time in the garden and chopped back my unruly tomato plants. There are so many tomatoes on there - I just hope some turn red. It felt so good to have finished my run and be able to have time to just do some things that needed to be done.

We also took Parker to the beach at Bayview which is a dog park. He was hilarious. To begin with he was't sure of the sand. His ball got all sandy and he really wanted it, but kept spitting it out and spitting out sand. We then threw his ball into a little water. Took him a while to get into it, and a fair bit of coaxing, but he was soon properly swimming after his ball. So awesome. On Sunday we took him to the Spit and he got a swim there too. We also went on the wharf and dropped his ball off the edge to see what he would do (the edge is only a couple cm above the water). He bobbed for it a couple times from the wharf until it got too far away, then walked up and down looking at us, then the ball, then us. He went to jump in a couple times, but was a bit scared. Then he just kinda mistepped and fell in! Poor little guy - he went so far under. He popped up a distance away then started swimming away from us! I called him and he orientated himself, then instead of coming straight back he went and got his ball. Man he loves his ball! So funny.

Managed to get a bit of ski club work done. I really need to do more of it, but so hard to find time around everything else. I'm thinking once I get exercise and eating back on track and feeling better, it will hopefully just fall into place. That's the theory anyway! At the moment I'm so tired when I get home from work it's the last thing I feel like doing.

This morning I got up and did my hill intervals. It was hard, and I'm hurting a bit now. So glad I did them though. Felt bad leaving Parker behind. Ah well, he got a little run this afternoon and he will get to go with me tomorrow morning. Can't wait until he can run with me. Then I can just take him. Though be a bit hard to do hill sprints with him unless I can find a hill where he can be off the lead.

My eating has been much more focused the past few days too. Still not perfect, but better. Just need to keep at it! I can do it!

I've been reading this blog from someone who has lost 50kgs, and still has 30 to go (wow!). She does these great sticker charts and has "operations". I'm thinking I might need an Operation Europe chart, with stickers. She gets one a day for each of Nutrition, Exercise, Sleep and Water, if she's met her targets. I love geeky things like that, so I reckon it might be a good thing to get me back into it again.

A Fresh Start

Ok, so the last round did not go at all as planned. There were no major issues or anything, but I just didn't manage to get things together at all. Then recently I have been completely sabotaging myself - way too much food and no self control what so ever. Dairy seems to be my total downfall - it's something we normally have at home, and cheese is healthy (ish) right, so I can it lots of it right? And you can't have cheese without bread or crackers etc right? WRONG!!! To top it off and make matters worse I pretty much stopped exercising. I got the MVP award at basketball this season, and should be feeling great about it! Instead I'm feeling fat and slow and like I don't deserve it. Time to make a change and have a fresh start!

I've signed up for another round of 12WBT which starts today. Feeling very up and down about it. At times I am super motivated, but then at other times I just can't be bothered, and I stuff up. Like this morning - went to get a coffee, and came back with a large coffee and banana bread. And it wasn't even all that nice. Now I just feel full and fat and gross. Thinking perhaps I will delay lunch and not have the afternoon snack unless I am starving.

One thing I have really noticed is that when i am doing well I drink so much water. And when I'm not I drink almost none. So, I have decided that I need to drink more water. And I need to ensure that I fill up my drink bottle. So often I sit at my desk and pick up my bottle to drink, only to find it's empty. Then a minute later I'm picking it up again. Need to just get up and go fill it! Will only take a couple secs and then I can have more water, and then I am less likely to eat stuff I don't need to.

This round I have decided to switch things up a little and do the advanced 10km program. I'm really lookign forward to the running. I have a little dilemma though - Parker is only 14 weeks old, and can't really run with me yet. But we both love getting out in the morning and seeing all his little doggy friends, and it's so important to socialise him at this stage. I need to work out a way to do both. Perhaps sneak out while he is still in bed then he can have his walkies with both Greg and I in the evenings? Or go somewhere where I can either tie him up or let him loose while I run laps. I went out today fully planning on running, but the oval was full of people and I didn't know how he would go tied up, and I didn't want to let him loose as he would be too annoying for them. Need to get the exercise in though. Maybe after work.

The other thing I'm going to change up is my blog. About time for a refresh! I think I will make it running based - lots of blue skies and open spaces and running pics. In case I forget how it looks - here's a pic of the old style.

Day 3 - Exercise Fabulous! Eating Not So Great...

So had a fabulous first few days exercise wise. Did about an 8km run on Monday, then the toning workout yesterday and then another run with sprints this morning. I thought the workout yesterday was pretty easy compared to week 12, but I'm quite sore today! I did go quite hard, and it feels really good. My run this morning was a little sluggish, but I managed it and tacked some sprints on to the end.

My eating on the other hand... I ate loads of crap yesterday afternoon, then Greg convinced me to go out for dinner (which was so yummy!), and then I ate crap again this morning. So stupid! Don't know why I do it!

Week 1 Food & Exercise Plan

Pre-Season Task - Set Your Goals

Time for those updated goals again. The end weight hasn't changed all that much, but the time frame and the realistic-ness of it has. I'm pretty happy with the weight lost in my first round, but feel like I could definitely have done better in my second round. Midn you... it was over Christmas. 

Anyway, another 6.5kgs to lose this round. It's going to be hard, but I can do it!

	TIME	DATE	WEIGHT	INCREMENTAL	TOTAL CHANGE
ACTUAL PROGRESS
Sign Up Weight		14 Jul 2013	92
Start Round 3 2013	4 Weeks	10 Aug 2013	90.4	-1.6	-1.6
End Round 3 2013	12 Weeks	3 Nov 2013	81.7	-8.7	-10.3
End Round 4 2013	12 Weeks	2 Feb 2014	78.5	-3.2	-13.5
FUTURE GOALS
Week 4	4 Weeks	2 Mar 2014	76	-2.5	-16
Week 8	4 Weeks	30 Mar 2014	74	-2	-18
End Round 1 2014	4 Weeks	27 Apr 2014	72	-2	-20

Day 1 - Here We Go Again!

And we're off! February 2014 round here I come. I'm feeling great and super motivated today. I finished the last round ok - kinda met my (revised) 78kg goal weight, and am feeling much better about myself. Had a bit of a slack last few weeks eating wise though. I seem to last a few days, then it all falls by the wayside again. So stupid!

This morning I went for a big run. Not sure exactly how far it was as I've lost my GPS thingy which is so annoying! Map my run said it was about 8kms, however lots of it was on trails so I wouldn't be surprised if it was longer. It took me 56mins. It felt super good. I was pretty tired by the end, but could have probably kept going. I purposely chose a route that went on trails as much as possible, and took in loads of up and down hill. It was hurting at the end, but I kept saying to myself "this is where it counts" and just kept going. Am proud of myself! My next trail run is on Sunday and I'd quite like to be a little more prepared this time. I think if I don't go out so fast, and save a little more energy for all that up and down at the end I should be able to beat my time.

I've decided that I'm going to cancel my gym, or at least put it on hold. It's really hard to get there during the day now that I've moved work, and that means the only time I will go is Tuesday morning Shockwave classes. It used to be my favourite class, but the instructor has changed and she is not as good. She doesn't change up the exercises much, and it's become quite easy for me. I think this round I will solely focus on the 12WBt workouts, and my running. I'm looking forward to it!

I've made a start on the pre season tasks again. Not sure I will do them all, but I've just done the excuses one. It opened my eyes quite a lot to the excuses I use, and I realised the solutions I wrote the last couple times were not great. This time I've written them more as if someone is sitting there and being totally open and honest with me about how pathetic the excuses are. Now I just need to remember they are there, and go back to them often!

Pre-Season Task - Get Real

I wasn't going to do this task this time around, but then I thought about it and I still get lots of excuses popping up so thought it was worth revisiting...

Here are my excuses and my solutions:

Exercise Excuses

E: I'll do it later
S:You won't do it later. You never do. Stop procrastinating and JFDI. The sooner you get started the sooner it will be done and you can move on to the rest of your day.

E: I can't be bothered
S: Suck it up! Remember how good it feels when you get off your ass and do it.Think how amazing you will look at the end of 12 weeks if you stick to it, and think about how lazy and crap you'll feel if you don't. Get started and it will be fine.

E: I need to do something else
S: Think about it - is it actually more important? Prioritise. Remember: 1. EM Dev, 2. Health, 3. House etc. If the something else is more important then take another look at your plan. Can you rearrange to fit both in? If not choose which to sacrifice, and make up for it as best you can (e.g. if you have to sacrifice a workout, be extra diligent about what you eat).

E: I will be too tired to do something I have planned for later today
S: Prioritise - which is more important? The workout or later activity? Can you do a lighter workout today and be diligent with eating? Can you replan your week to shuffle your workouts or rest days? Also remember the more you exercise, over time the more energy you will have.

Eating & Drinking Excuses

E: I'm hungry 
S: Are you really? What have you eaten today? Is it time to eat again? Maybe you are just thirsty or bored. Go have  big drink of water, wait 10 minutes and then reassess. Find something to do - look at your to do list or read 12WBT forums

E: It tastes so good and I just want it
S: Does it really? Does it taste better than looking amazing? How will you feel after you eat it? Can you just take a taste and leave the rest? As pre "I'm hungry" - go drink some water and find something to do.

E: I've done my workout today or the scales showed a good number today so I can eat anything
S: No you can't! You've done the work to make the weight come off. If you eat everything then it will negate all that hard work. Keep going you can do it! Remember how great your tummy feels when you wake up in the morning and you haven't binged. Remember how good it feels to see that weight keep coming down.

E: I need to join in - I don't want everyone thinking I'm on a diet and I'm boring
S: Think about this - will they actually think that? And if they do, do you really care? After all, even if you're not on a diet, you are watching what you eat, and you eat a lot more than everyone else already. And you don't have to drink just to be interesting. People will understand. And a lot of our friends aren't drinking a lot at the moment anyway. Just be yourself and relax, and remember why you are doing this, and what the sacrifice is for. You'll be thankful tomorrow when you're not hungover and you can do your workout!

E: There's nothing too cook
S: Really? Why not? Have you done your planning? Can you do it right now (even if just for tonight) then make a quick trip to IGA or supermarket? Is there anything in the cupboards you can make?

E: I don't feel like cooking or I don't have time to cook tonight
S: Really? Get off your ass and do it. You have a plan - stick to it. And if you don't or can't then scrambled eggs takes less than 10mins and is easy. Look in the cupboards - there will be something to make. This is not an excuse to get takeaways!

E: I didn't make my lunch or I forgot it
S: So? Go get something healthy and small. This is not an excuse to pig out! There is great food within walking distance. And look in your drawer - you have some snacks in there (or you should have), and at worst you have protein powder. Remember how good you feel when you do what you know you should.

Day 82 - So Close To The Finish Line

Before and After

Almost there - only 2 days to go on this round, then it's right back into another round on Monday! I'm a sucker for punishment. Then again, it feels so good, and I'm pretty darn happy with the results, so I'm gonna keep it up.

Haven't done my final fitness test yet, but did a weigh in this morning, and my measurements. I'm now at 78.7kgs and another 16cm down all over. Was a nice surprise to see how many cms I've lost, although it probably shouldn't be, as all my clothes are fitting so much better. I also took another set of photos and am pretty pleased with the difference between beginning of this round and now, but even more so from beginning of last round and now. Go me!

It's been a pretty full on few days with exercise. Massive workout on Tue, 8km run and bball on Wed and bball at lunch and in the evening yesterday! Was planning on doing something this morning but was so tired I went back to sleep. Or at least I tried to - Greg wouldn't stop snoring so I ended up getting up and doing the washing and the rest of last nights dishes instead! I've got my gear so I can do something at lunch time, but thinking maybe I will just have a rest day and go super hard for my SSS on Saturday. We'll see.

Day 79 - 5 Days To Go!

Me in the Manly Dam
run a few weeks back

Wow. Can't believe there's only 5 days of this round left. Crazy! I've done ok, but not amazing. Had some really good weeks, but then I just sabotage it all for some reason. So stupid, cos the food sabotage only feels good for about 5mins while I am eating. And when I'm doing well I just feel super great! Need to remember that and get back into it.

We've had probably the busiest week ever this past week as we've moved into a new house. Super exciting! A real house in Sydney with a back yard. It's such a great place - I think we're going to totally love it there. It was definitely more than we wanted to spend, but as we're putting of the kids decision we've decided to just live this year like we would if we had no kids, and see where it takes us. We do need to get our act into gear though and make this our year. No stupid frivolous spending, but enjoying ourselves. Working hard and playing hard!

Greg's boys came over for the weekend for Greg Day and we had a fabulous time. Between that and the moving though I am exhausted! And I have quite a bit of work to catch up on, and still plenty of boxes. It's straight to the supermarket when I get home, then I'm going to sit down in my new (half-unpacked) office and catch up on at least the emails. Then I think I will unpack some more of the office. I actually enjoy the unpacking, as I love finding everything it's home, and I love the feel of it when it's all done.

I did my first workout in a while today and it was pretty hard! I didn't make it through all of it, but it was a good effort, and I got to do it outside in our backyard. So lovely!

Finally remembered to look up the results for that run I did a few weeks back. I thought I had stuffed it cos I went out so hard and struggled big time on the last couple of kms. However, I ended up 5th female in my age group, and 23rd overall (out of 65) in the 7km. Not bad for hardly any training! The next one is on 9 Feb, which is only a couple of weeks away. Need to try and do a couple big runs between now and then to prepare! Only thing is I think I lost my GPS thingy at the last event, so now can't clock kms. Annoying!

I just read back over my last post which is when I was doing good and feeling great. My revised goals had me down to 78, and 10 days ago, that's where I was, and I was aiming for the 77 or even 76 this round. This morning I was back up at 82. So dumb!  I need to target that feeling again. It's just 5 more days this round, that's easy! Lets finish this round on a roll!

Week 12 Food & Exercise Plan

Day 74 - Almost There

Well I've had a pretty fabulous week. I'm down to the lowest so far today (78.9) and am feeling great! I've done quite a lot of exercise over the past week, and I've also been SO much better with my eating. It has probably helped that I've hardly drunk as well. Also just realised that 78 was my updated goal for this round (which I reset last week), and looks like if I keep on as I am I will easily get there. Just need to keep it through Australia Day! I'm going to now aim for low 77 or even high 76.

Last weekend I did the SSS on Saturday which was massive! I worked so hard at it. Then on Sunday I did my trail run which was incredibly hard! The first 5-6 kms felt great. I was going fast but was managing it well. The last 1.5 kms however is a completely different story... it was all up and down and very uneven. I ended up having to walk a lot of the ends and was exhausted at the end. I think next time I definitely need to start out a little slower! Or maybe do some training beforehand! Regardless I still enjoyed it, especially the dip in the dam at the end which felt amazing! Would be nice next time to maybe have some people I know to do it with as felt a little lonely.

Sunday afternoon we went up to Whale Beach to see my sister and her kids and had a lovely afternoon, even though I was shattered. The beach was so nice, and the weather perfect! On the way home though my throat started to feel scratchy and on Monday morning I woke up with the worst sore throat I've had in a very long time! I was gutted as I really don't want to be sick! Luckily after staying home and quiet on Monday I didn't actually get too sick. I'm a bit snuffly and blocked, but the sore throat has gone, and today and yesterday I was able to do my exercises again. The good thing is that I didn't let myself go off the rails too much, and managed to continue losing weight through the weekend and also through being sick.

Also, we've found a house to move into! Yay! No more apartment for us. And that means we can get a dog and a cat. Super excited! We get the keys on Monday and I can't wait. It's all happened really fast. I really don't want to be at work. We have so much packing and organising to do before we can move. Also we're going away this weekend which will be fun, but will also mean even more stress about packing.

Basketball today at lunch time for the first time at work. Will be interesting to see how I go. I'm quite tired from playing a fill in game last night, and also weights workouts this morning and yesterday. I also have my own team basketball game tonight.

Revisiting My Goals

Time to take another look at my goals and update for the last 4 weeks of this round. I think I need to set more realistic goals as I haven't really met any of them. If you look at my current weight I haven't lost anything since the end of last round. I do feel a LOT fitter though, and Christmas has been in the middle. The lightest I've been this round (for one day!) was 79.5. Other than that I've mainly floated around the 81 mark with a couple of leaps back up into 83. Need to keep focussed for this last three weeks and I think I can get properly into under 80s. And then I'm signing up for another round to try get to my real goal weight.

	TIME	DATE	WEIGHT	INCREMENTAL	TOTAL CHANGE
ACTUAL PROGRESS
Sign Up Weight		14 Jul 2013	92
Start Round 3 2013	4 Weeks	10 Aug 2013	90.4	-1.6	-1.6
End Round 3 2013	12 Weeks	3 Nov 2013	81.7	-8.7	-10.3
Current (week 9 Round 4)	8 Weeks	10 Jan 2014	81.8	+0.1	-10.2
FUTURE GOALS
End Round 4 2013	3 Weeks	2 Feb 2014	78	-3.8	-14
Week 4	4 Weeks		75	-3	-17
Week 8	4 Weeks		72	-3	-20
End Round 1 2014	12 Weeks	4 April 2014	70	-2	-22

Day 61 - And I'm Back!

Ok, I'm now officially back into this. Had a fabulous day yesterday and kept my eating under control as well as doing a good amount of exercise with both a core workout in the morning, and then basketball last night. I'm feeling so much better today, and already the scales are showing it. It's not just dehydration either as I drank so much water yesterday and last night.

Basketball last night ruled. We won and I really enjoyed it. I'm playing so much better than I ever have. Just imagine how much better I will be once I've lost more weight and am even fitter! By the end of the game last night my legs were definitely close to giving out!

This morning I got up and went for a (quite pathetic) run. It was really hard as my legs were so tired and didn't want to go. I had planned to do a fitness fat burner with the gully sprints, but I was just too tired. I still managed to do over 300cals though by the time I added in my planks for this week challenge (total of 40mins!). My stomach was so sore last night - I couldn't work out whether it was a sore tummy or due to all the planks and yesterdays core workout. It's still pretty sore this morning, but I think it's muscular now.

On another topic... over the holidays my sister was telling me about this new diet that some people she knows are doing - 5:2. Basically it's 2 non-consecutive days of fasting a week (~500 cals), and normal eating on the other days. I'm not sure about it, but it sounds similar to our Tighten Up Tuesdays, though far more extreme. I'm thinking I might give it a go, but maybe not to the full extent. Instead try keep to around 900cals on Tues and Thurs, and the others at 1200. We'll see what happens!

Also, I'm going to re-jig my goals today. There's unfortunately no way I will hit the 72kgs by the end of this round, so I'm going to adjust to something achievable and then do another round to get down there. It's so silly as I know I can do it, and I do so well for a few days then royally stuff up! I'm planning on having a really good weekend and next week, and hopefully that should bump me back down under 80, then I can just continue from there. I can do it!

Day 60 - Back on Track

Ok I'm feeling much better and like I'm back on track today. Ended up having a pretty abysmal afternoon and evening yesterday. Had a full list of things I was going to do (see yesterdays post), and ended up not doing many of them at all! When Greg picked me up from the station I was so tired and grumpy (excuses!) and on the way to the supermarket we both decided we felt like pasta (which wasn't on the menu). One thing led to another and before I knew it we were out to dinner yet again! At least we didn't overeat too badly, and I didn't drink much. And we still went to the supermarket after dinner.

This morning I finally got up to my alarm after ignoring it the past few days, and did my core workout. I didn't think it was that bad, but I can really feel my tummy muscles starting to complain now! For the rest of the day I have been good as well - oats, berries & yoghurt for breakfast, vegemite & cottage cheese wrap for snack, cupcake quiche for lunch (which I made when we got home last night) and just had celery & hummus for my afternoon snack. I've been drinking loads of water and am feeling so much better for it too! Just wish it didn't make me need to go to the bathroom so often!

We're having peri chicken salad tonight which should be tasty, then I have basketball. Looking forward to the scales being back on the downward trend tomorrow!

Oh - also just discovered that I can do the trail run I want to do as it's this weekend, not next (we're away golfing next weekend). Yay! Now just need to convince Greg I have time to do it as we also want to play golf. Hmmm... wonder if I can do a 7km trail run and then play golf in the afternoon or if I will be too tired! Good excuse at least to not drink too much or stay out too late with the basketball girls if our gathering happens on Saturday.

Day 59 - Why Can't I Control My Urges?

So dumb. Was so full of good intentions yesterday after reading the forums and posting here, then when I was putting away the Christmas decorations at work yesterday afternoon I found a few mini choc bars left over from our party. I wasn't going to eat them, but then caved after Greg called suggesting we have a bottle of bubbles and go out for dinner. I initially said no, but the seed had been planted, and somehow that lead to eating crap on the way home then the bubbles (which were delicious) and the dinner out (which was also delicious). It's so hard to find a balance. I love going out for dinner with Greg. We have such a good time and enjoy it so much. It's our relaxation time and a time we can chat freely to each other about anything.

We had a big chat last night about our plans for this year, whether we're going to have babies, whether we're going to buy a house etc. No decisions made except that we both need to get in better shape. We've put a deadline on it - by the end of Feb we need to be healthy enough to start trying for kids if that is our decision. And if it's not our decision then at least we will be in better shape and ready to look into buying a house and continuing our awesome life! Whichever way we go, there does need to be some drastic changes in our mind sets. I think I need to go back and watch some of the videos and get my head back into the game. I've done nothing but eat the last 8 days, and haven't done any exercise yet this week and it's already Wednesday!

Somehow we need to change our lives so that we can continue to enjoy the things we like (eating, drinking, going out for dinner etc), but still stay healthy and save money. Moderation I think is the key. And self control and discipline. We need to set ourselves some guidelines and stick to them.

So... this evening's action plan for me:

• Now: Amend my eating plan and shopping list for this week seeing as we went out for dinner last night
• 4:30: Leave work by 4:30 
• 5:00: Go straight to the supermarket after work
• 6:00: Unpack groceries when I get home and help Greg get started on dinner
• 6:30: Head out the door for a run by 6:30 - 15min run, 10x gully sprints, jog home
• 7:15: Do first lot of planks after run - aim for 4 mins
• 7:30: Shower and dinner
• 8:00: 1 hour of Ski club work :(
• 9:00: Second lot of planks followed by relaxation time with Greg
• 10:00: Bed by 10pm
• 11:00: Lights out before 11pm

And tomorrow morning I AM going to get up and do the core workout before work. I will enjoy it, and my core is an area I need to focus on. It will also get me set up for the day. I CAN DO THIS!

Day 58 - Picking Myself Up and Starting Again

Christmas Day Prawn Salad

Christmas Day Roast Pork 

Time to give myself a swift kick in the pants and get back into this! Had a lovely Christmas break with the family. Did plenty of exercise, but once again let myself down on the eating front. Started off ok, but just got steadily worse. There were a lot of "red flag days" including Greg's parents bday party, Christmas day, Boxing day family party, New Years Eve and My Birthday. I would have been happy if it was just those days I overate on, but it wasn't. Basically any chance I had to get food I took. Sneaking chocolates, having a jam sandwich with the niece and nephew (even though I'd just had breakfast), butter and jam on toast (right after bacon and eggs), cheese and crackers, seconds for dinners and lots of desserts. Not to mention the drinking. I don't think I was hungry once the entire time!

Luckily on the first day I saw a sign advertising body combat classes outside the fire station, so day 2 saw me there at 7:45 ready to go! The classes were good, and were my saviour! I worked really hard at them and totally enjoyed the body combat and the little bit of GRIT thrown in. I'm thinking I might have to see if Fitness First has them, or even start martial arts again as it was so fun! In the 10 days at the beach I managed 5 classes, went for one awesome run, and played lots of golf (mostly with a cart so not much exercise). Also did a pilates and run in Auckland before the beach.

So exercise wise I was fine! It was just the eating and drinking that I let myself down on - as usual. But now it's time to nip it in the bud. I've had a crap morning - maccas for breakfast, followed by croissant and mini pizza. So bad! I've been reading through the Michelle Bridges forums now though and am feeling motivated again. I can do this! This morning was a write off, but that's past now and there is not much I can do about it except pick myself up and get going properly! Before I went into the forums I was planning to keep my binge going and find something crap for lunch and read my book. Instead I've been productive and I've made a plan and a shopping list, and am not going to eat again until dinner (no need as I am so stuffed full!). I've got my full water bottle on my desk (2nd one for today!) and every time I think of eating I will take a big swig.

That's actually one thing I have noticed. If I look back at all the times I've binged or even just over eaten, there is no water bottle in sight. Not sure if it's when I drink lots of water that I don't feel the need to scoff, or whether it just replaces the need. Either way, I need to remember to keep drinking that water! And if I don't have a water bottle then do something about it!

The holiday was mostly lovely. Matarangi beach is pretty nice, and the weather was typical NZ with a few sunny days, lots of clouds and a couple of rainy days. I was good with the sun cream for once and didn't get burnt except for my ears which I forgot to put sun cream on when we played golf! My sister's kids are gorgeous but such trouble and so noisy! It wasn't the most relaxing holiday as we were woken up early every morning, andmy niece took an absolute liking to poor "Greggy" and wouldn't leave him alone. Every time he was around she wanted to hang off him so he didn't get much peace and quiet. He loved it and hated it at the same time - said it was special, but also annoying! We all thought it was pretty cute.

It was super nice to have both my family and Greg's around, but also a lot of hard work as we were a bit torn between the two. I think next time it might be better to do it separately. Although we did have a couple of lovely times with both families together, and my sister's kids loved Greg's sister's 1 year old. They were adorable with her.

We played loads of golf, 4 or 5 rounds at Matarangi, plus a couple in Auckland before we went. So glad we took our clubs in the end as it actually was pretty easy and saved us quite a bit of money. I played with mixed success. To being with I was ok, but as soon as anyone was watching, or there was any pressure I started over thinking it and I sucked! One thing that did improve was my chipping. I definitely am now better at hitting that more consistently. Though I still need to work on my distance! I'm really looking forward to getting back to the driving range as my driving needs some work. Not sure what's going on, but I just can't seem to hit with it any more!

Teeing off on the second at Matarangi. Pretty good backdrop!

Week 9 Exercise & Food Plan